How exactly am I meant to do that?

I want to do a PhD. Not right now obviously, still got to finish this masters (and pass at a good standard). But that is the next step for me. I think.

I hope.

Anyway. Manc is having an open day on the 23rd. Invitation only. To get an invite I have to fill in an application form (I think I left one in the graduate lounge, it has my name, phone number and date of birth on it. How desperate must I look!) plus a full further study application form. AND have TWO referees.

I've been on the course 2 months, I am only one third of the way through my second practical and my first essay deadline is over a month away (am bricking it about that already). My professor just about knows my name at this point, so how can she write about my academic prowess?

All very disturbing coupled with the fact I am getting that same feelings of inadequacy I had during undergraduate days. The feeling that at any moment, someone is going to jump out in a Michael-Palin-Spanish-Inquisition-Pythonesque sort of way and yell;

"You girl! How the fuck did you get on this couse? You know nothing! You don't belong here!!"

My faith in my own abilities has no beginning, you could say.

Oh well. There's always the dole queue.